SUNDAY REFLECTIONS: When That Rough God Goes Riding

Harper Lee was once asked why she never wrote another book after To Kill A Mockingbird. She said, “I have already said everything I wanted to say.” Poignant, no doubt.

In this same way, another writer and musician said almost everything I’ve ever wanted to say to the pharmaceutical companies, their executives, their lawyers, their consciences (if any of them even has one, that he must be ignoring). . .

In. One. B-side. Song.

Best listened to with headphones, and the words in front of you, not the video, IMHO.

From Van Morrison’s 1997’s album, The Healing Game . . .

“Rough God”

Van Morrison

Oh the mud splattered victims
Have to pay out all along the ancient highway
Torn between half truth and victimisation
Fighting back with counter attacks

It’s when that rough God goes riding
When the rough God goes gliding
And that rough God goes riding
Riding on in

I was flabbergasted by the headlines
People in glasshouses throwing stones
Gaping wounds that will never heal
Now they’re moaning like a dog in a manger

It’s when that rough God goes riding
And that rough God goes gliding
There’ll be nobody hiding
When that rough God goes riding on in

And it’s a matter of survival
When you’re born with your back against the wall
Won’t somebody hand me a Bible
Won’t you give me that number to call

When that rough God goes riding
And then that rough God goes gliding
They’ll be nobody hiding
When that rough God goes riding on in
Riding on in

When that rough God goes riding
When that rough God goes gliding
There’ll be nobody hiding
When that rough God goes riding on in
Riding on in

There’ll be no more heroes
They’ll be reduced to zero
When that rough God goes riding
Riding on in
Riding on in
Riding on in
Riding on in

 

 

 

 

A Great Reminder for All of Us

aggression-487274_960_720Taken from Desiring God.org . . .

“But sinful anger does not bear redemptive fruit. Rather, it leaves us with a grey, burned-over barrenness of exasperated frustration. It produces a sour feeling in the pit of our gut. Sinful anger alienates us from God. It does not move us toward acts of faith and love and true justice, but rather toward acts of selfishness like sullen withdrawal, irritability, rudeness, obstinacy, and bitterness. Sinful anger is characterized by the self-oriented grief of self-pity, not godly grief over evil. And it produces the cancer of cynicism that eats away at faith, eroding our desire to pray.”      

~ Jon Bloom

To My Beloved Warriors

The Mesh Warrior ℠

GracefulExitTo My Beloved Warriors;

We have done much good together – you and me. I will be taking a leave of absence from my duties as The Mesh Warrior to tend to the matters of my own family. At this time, I cannot tell you when I will resume.

Nehemiah 8:10

“Nehemiah said, ‘Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is holy to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.’”

Hebrews 12:1-3

12 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us,fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of our faith. For the joy set before him he endured the…

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To My Beloved Warriors

GracefulExitTo My Beloved Warriors;

We have done much good together – you and me. I will be taking a leave of absence from my duties as The Mesh Warrior to tend to the matters of my own family. At this time, I cannot tell you when I will resume.

Nehemiah 8:10

“Nehemiah said, ‘Go and enjoy choice food and sweet drinks, and send some to those who have nothing prepared. This day is holy to our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength.’”

Hebrews 12:1-3

12 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles. And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of our faith. For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.

Find one another in the darkness, and never lose hope in doing what is good, no matter how small it may seem to you. God bless each one of you.

Aaron

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Symptom Spotlight – “Ascites”*

Today’s Spotlight Symptom is:  “Ascites”

Many mesh-injured women and men suffer from this condition, yet it seems to be one of those symptoms that many doctors write off as “idiopathic” when seen in mesh-injured patients. Please refer to yesterday’s blog post to understand how doctors use the term “idiopathic” in a clinical setting.

Click here to learn how to Pronounce Ascites

Definition of Ascites: Ascites is the accumulation of fluid (usually serous fluid which is a pale yellow and clear fluid) that accumulates in the abdominal (peritoneal) cavity. The abdominal cavity is located below the chest cavity, separated from it by the diaphragm. Ascitic fluid can have many sources such as liver disease, cancers, congestive heart failure, or kidney failure. (SOURCE: http://www.medicinenet.com)

Medical-Diagnosis-2-callout-EN1

Below are actual pictures of Ascites in mesh-injured patients. These four women have shared these intimate photos in hopes that their injuries will help YOU, the reader, or another injured person you may know.

THANK YOU TO THESE MESH WARRIORS!

Ascites_Picture_Mesh_Injury

 

“While a tense abdomen filled with fluid is easy to recognize, initially, the amount of ascites fluid may be small and difficult to detect. As the amount of fluid increases, the patient may complain of a fullness or heaviness in the abdomen. It is often the signs of the underlying disease that initially brings the patient to seek medical care.” (SOURCE: emedicinehealth.com)

As I explained in yesterday’s blog, when a patient goes to the doctor with a symptom that doesn’t present in the most common medical context, many doctors do not pursue further understanding about why a common symptom is presenting in an uncommon way.

For example, the most common cause of Ascites is cirrhosis of the liver. So, say a mesh-injured woman presents to her physician with Ascites, but has no history of liver disease or alcoholism, and no cirrhosis of the liver. What happens next; or more appropriately, what should happen next?

The process of diagnosing the underlying cause of any symptom is performed by using the method of differential diagnosis. In the case of Ascites, one other possible explanation for the symptom is:

“Those who have spontaneous bacterial peritonitis (an infection of the peritoneum) develop abdominal pain and fever.” (SOURCE: http://www.emedicinehealth.com/ascites/page3_em.htm)

It is now well known that mesh can cause life-threatening and recurrent infection. So it seems to me that further investigation would be crucial to any patient with mesh who presents with Ascites.

Differential Diagnosis – the determination of which of two or more diseases with similar symptoms is the one from which the patient is suffering, by a systematic comparison and contrasting of the clinical findings.

Physicians are taught to follow these procedures to continue to rule out every cause, until a fotolia_5910589_XSshort list of possible causes remain. Ruling out underlying causes of any symptom(s) is carried out through a sequence of examinations and diagnostic testing.

With this symptom in particular, I am hearing from many women who are sent away by their doctors with some variation of an excuse, claiming ignorance, or at best, simply treating the condition with pharmaceuticals while refusing to perform simple diagnostic procedures and testing that could provide that doctor with more information and eventually to a better form of treatment, or cure ,and the underlying cause of the symptom.

So, when a mesh-injured patient presents with Ascites, and the physician has ruled out the most common cause of this symptom (cirrhosis of the liver), then his training requires that he begin to rule out additional possible causes.

In graph form, the process of ruling out causes for Ascites might look something like this:

ascites

 

Doctors are trained to use the above method with every symptom or illness. It is part of their daily scope of work, so why do I so often hear from women that they go to the ER, to their family physicians, to their OB/Gyns, and to their Urogynecologists with this disturbing symptom only to be told something like this, “I don’t know what this is,” or “I’ve never seen this before.”? The above process for differential diagnosis is relatively simple. Even the diagnostic testing is relatively simple, as noted above.

To find out more about testing used in the diagnosis of suspected Ascites, refer to the below pictures, and click on these links to learn more.

Abdominal Ultrasound

abdominal ultrasound

Diagnostic Paracentesis

drainas-300x206

Computed Tomography (CT Scan)

anatomy_of_a_CT_scan

These women describe to their physicians that this symptom is not simply uncomfortable, but it’s PAINFUL. They describe shortness of breath, difficulty breathing, naseau and vomiting, and the obvious limitations in lifestyle and decreased quality of life – not being able to fit into clothing, not being able to lie on their stomachs, pain when sitting, etc. Imagine all the uncomfortable symptoms of being nine months pregnant, except this situation doesn’t end in the birth of a beautiful new family member.

I find it maddening, sickening, detestable, and downright cruel that so many doctors refuse to treat mesh-injured men and women, especially when these patients present with odd or “out of the box” symptoms.

I encourage you to print and use the above graph if you suspect you have this symptom. Bring it to your doctor. Earlier this week, I spoke with a woman who went to her Ob/Gyn with this symptom, and he simply told her there was nothing he could do to help her. What?! She even asked for some of the testing in the above graph, but still the physician refused to help her.

The question we should be asking is “Why?” The action we should be taking is to educate ourselves about our own bodies and what our bodies are trying to communicate to us through symptoms. Our physicians must understand that we know they are refusing treatment, and we know that it’s wrong to do so.

Stay tuned for tomorrow’s “Spotlight Symptom.” I hope this information will help you when you visit your doctor, seeking treatment and a better quality of life.

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*I am not a doctor. This information is for educational purposes, and is based on my own experiences. Seek medical attention for this or any other symptom.

 

 

 

MESH INJURY – “Spotlight Symptoms”

Hello Warriors;

Today, I’m starting a blog series called, “MESH INJURY – Spotlight Symptoms.”*

TVMI encounter an alarmingly typical and recurrent problem when advocating for and with mesh-injured patients. It goes something like this:

  1. Mesh-injured patient develops a disturbing symptom.
  2. Mesh-injured patient visits his/her PCP or a specialist to seek diagnosis and treatment.
  3. Physician performs a physical exam, and says something like, “I don’t know what that is,” or I’ve never seen anything like this [symptom].”
  4. Patient is confused and bewildered and asks if there are tests that could be done or another doctor or specialist who would know more about the symptom.
  5. Physician says, “No,” and doesn’t perform any diagnostics to find out the underlying cause of the symptom (environmental cause, disease process, injury, or infectious pathogen).
  6. Physician prescribes medicine to mask or alleviate symptom(s) (e.g. topical creams for rashes, antibiotics for a suspected infection, maybe some other pharmaceutical to control pain or discomfort, or even an invasive or non-invasive form of treatment).
  7. Patient goes home still symptomatic, with no diagnosis, and with one or more pharmaceutical or other treatments to consider, which may or may not work, since the UNDERLYING CAUSE or UNDERLYING PATHOLOGY, which caused the symptom to manifest, was never studied in depth by the treating physician.
  8. Patient goes home and follows pharmaceutical regimen or advice for treatment.
  9. Pharmaceuticals and treatments do not alleviate symptom(s). Symptom(s) continue.
  10. Patient is left untreated and without a next step.

Paternalistic-vs-Patient-CenteredOftentimes a physician will refer to a symptom as “idiopathic,” which in layman’s terms simply means, “Who knows where it came from?” There is a responsible use of this term, but I see it used irresponsibly too often.

Some diseases are generally agreed to be “of idiopathic origin,” because no one in science can definitively identify an underlying cause. In this case, “idiopathic” is often part of the name of the disease or syndrome itself. Some examples are:

  • Idiopathic Thrombocytopenic Purpura (sometimes called Acute or Chronic ITP) is a bleeding disorder, in which a patient has abnormally low blood platelets, and thus their blood does not properly clot.
  • Idiopathic Hemochromatosis – is another bleeding disorder, in which an abnormal and dangerous amount of iron accumulates in the body’s tissues or organs, including the liver and lungs.

Both disorders are life threatening if left untreated. These disorders present with SYMPTOMS, and when doctors invest in diagnostic procedures, these diagnostic procedures, coupled with symptoms, lead them to a diagnosis, which then leads to a treatment or even a cure.

A serious problem arises when physicians use the word “idiopathic” irresponsibly. In all cases, any particular symptom or cluster of symptoms do originate from some cause, from something, from somewhere, and any doctor who does not search for the underlying cause of a symptom is negligent. “I don’t know,” would be a more accurate physician response in this situation, however; “idiopathic” sounds so much more, you know, medical and stuff. Odd or uncommon symptoms can often co-occur, simultaneously with other more salient symptoms, and when viewed together as a whole, the underlying disease process in these cases, can be more obvious, leading to a higher chance of diagnosis, or a more rapid diagnosis, which then leads to the correct treatment, to the best of the physician’s actual knowledge.

Puzzled male shrugging wearing lab coat

But, what if a patient presents with an idiopathic symptom that does not have a common accompanying symptom or cluster of symptoms that is easily recognizable to an average physician? In my personal experience, this situation is when physicians can get a bit lazy with the use of  the term”idiopathic.”

“Of idiopathic origin” is so much more dignified on a patient’s chart than:

“I have no friggin’ idea, but it’s not my problem, so I gave the patient some samples.”

So, has your physician ever told you, “I’ve never seen that symptom,” or “Your symptom seems to be idiopathic and will most likely resolve on its own.”?

If so, I’d love to hear from you.

Have you had the experience I describe above?device-transvaginal-mesh-edit

If you have, what was the symptom?

Did you ever get to the bottom of it?

Did the physician suggest diagnostic testing, or did you ask for such if he/she did not?

Did you find your doctors to be helpful in assisting you as you continued to pursue a cause, or did you find that your doctor quietly excused himself from your care, and left you to find some other doctor who might help?

Tuesday we’ll talk about the first of many symptoms which are commonly seen in mesh-injured patients, but for which doctors often say there is no explanation or that physician seems to have no drive to find an explanation.

With this series of blogs, I hope to highlight some very common symptoms, for which mesh-injured patients are turned away, left with no medical solution to pursue. Let’s use our collective knowledge as a community to help one another and to help those who don’t understand the realities of ongoing mesh injury.

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*I am not a doctor. This information is for education purposes only and is based on my personal experiences. If you have a symptom, please find a doctor who will help you identify and treat your symptoms.

Sunday Reflections from Another Patient

A beautiful poem by a patient and patient advocate, You will be moved, and I hope you will know you are not alone in your sorrow. Thanks to Mrs. Linda Radach for allowing us a peek into the deep night of her soul. Please comment if her words have touched your heart. We encourage one another in this way.

The Mesh Warrior ℠

Hello Warriors;

I have the great pleasure to share the thoughts of my friend, who is also a patient, and patient advocate.

Screen Shot 2016-04-10 at 8.21.52 AMMrs. Linda Radach and I met at the USA Patient Advocate Network workshop in D.C. last year, underwritten by the National Center for Health Research and the Patient-Centered Outcomes Research Institute (PCORI). Screen Shot 2016-04-10 at 8.21.37 AM

You know when you have the feeling that you’ve known someone forever, but you’ve only just met? That is the way I feel about Linda. Our friendship took mere hours to bloom, partly, I suspect, because she is a type of fertilizer for the soul.

Linda was injured by a failed hip implant, and she has suffered greatly as a result. Still, though her spirit is weary at times, she leans upon her faith in Christ and the Lord of the Bible for wisdom and strength. She has allowed me to share her faith and source of healing in…

View original post 414 more words

Sunday Reflections from Another Patient

Hello Warriors;

I have the great pleasure to share the thoughts of my friend, who is also a patient, and patient advocate.

Screen Shot 2016-04-10 at 8.21.52 AMMrs. Linda Radach and I met at the USA Patient Advocate Network workshop in D.C. last year, underwritten by the National Center for Health Research and the Patient-Centered Outcomes Research Institute (PCORI). Screen Shot 2016-04-10 at 8.21.37 AM

You know when you have the feeling that you’ve known someone forever, but you’ve only just met? That is the way I feel about Linda. Our friendship took mere hours to bloom, partly, I suspect, because she is a type of fertilizer for the soul.

Linda was injured by a failed hip implant, and she has suffered greatly as a result. Still, though her spirit is weary at times, she leans upon her faith in Christ and the Lord of the Bible for wisdom and strength. She has allowed me to share her faith and source of healing in a poem she wrote, Captured Free.

Scripture inspires her life and her writings. She has offered a collection of her thoughts and expressions of her pain in scripture here: Healing Worship – Lenten Study Notes. As a true believer, she runs further into the wisdom of God, so freely given to all, even in her suffering. I hope her words bring you comfort and serve as a salve for your aching soul. I know the many conversations we’ve had were powerful for me and healed some of the broken pieces in my soul. In the realm of human suffering, we are all alike. We all experience it in different ways, but suffering can bring those who sing, in spite of their trials, together – to make a beautiful noise to the Lord who hears our cries.

Here is a beautiful song to listen to, as you read Linda’s words and meditate on them.

Lord, Hear My Prayer

SongbirdSpectrumWC391

“Captured Free”

 

Songbird sits, quiet and still

No warble or whistle, no song or trill

Once free to fly, with songs soaring high

On the perch where she sits

Her soul wooden and dry

 

The view from her cage – dark and drear

No light or shadow, only shades of fear

Dreams shattered

Heart tattered

Pain has silenced her praise

 

There must be a way to regain her song

But night after night the silence grows long

Freedom and joy – mere memories now

Still, faint though it be, hope wonders how

A melody stirs in the darkness

 

Slowly light dawns upon the small locked cage

Revealing the way known to the wise and the sage

In this new morning she would take a chance

To free her soul and rejoin the dance

Humming the melody of the darkness

 

Imperceptible at first, the cage doors released

Giving flight to her wings as imprisonment ceased.

Tearful, yet growing stronger, her song she raised

Offering up a sacrifice of praise

Giving thanks for the limitations of her life in the cage.

 

By Linda J. L. Radach

November, 2012

 

Look for these beautiful songbirds, and remember the Lord’s word.

He cares for you.

“Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows”. – Luke 12:7

“Even the sparrow has found a home, and the swallow a nest for herself, where she may have her young— a place near your altar, Lord Almighty, my King and my God.” – Psalm 84:3

bird-poster